Muffle that rumble

Copyright 2005 Ben S. Pollock

Friday, May 20, 2005. Condensed from Fayetteville’s Northwest Arkansas Times this morning (or read whole article):

“Mayor Dan Coody wants attendees of Bikes, Blues and BBQ to ride quietly, a sentiment shared by the festival’s board of directors. ‘We encourage everyone to be quiet,’ said Richard Watson, chairman of the board. Watson said that not only do volunteers ask riders to be quiet and respect neighborhoods, but the group also has the request posted on its Web site, which reads, ‘BBB welcomes biker guests and ask that you please drive courteous and quietly.'”

The best attractions, for me, are those that naturally spring from a locale, a natural wonder like a waterfall, or manmade like being home to a prominent university (where the community and visitors can enjoy some student traditions, like homecoming or bed races down Dickson Street). Good tourist traps also are nicely derived from being first at something. But in recent decades fake tourism has taken over. These are near-arbitrary events being marketed as worth people’s time.

Which works. People do travel to various towns nationwide that coordinate garage sales to be on the same weekends. People come the Ozarks for the twice a year crafts fairs. A garage sale is a tag sale is a yard sale: Rummage, all, I say. I used to enjoy crafts fairs, here and in central Arkansas, Iowa, Texas, California, North Dakota. Until they grew boring: Little made at crafts fairs currently has any regional distinction or must-have quality. Or that enough new artisans appear year to year, enough to negotiate traffic, parking and crowds.

A biker weekend, here held in late September or early October, does not spring organically from Fayetteville. Harleys aren’t made here, nor is this the home of the first moto-cross race etc. Folks who like cycles and indeed the culture surrounding them, come here with no more thought than they would travel to any of the other biker rallies through the country. The rally at Sturgis, S.D., began in the 1930s, which makes it legit. But after it, the locale can’t matter.

So Fayetteville officials ask, or expect, for an event built in large part on rowdiness and noise (which is fun and American), to be subdued? Who are they fooling? Not the participants, and not the locals who will find streets and restaurants colorfully and frustratingly tied up that fall weekend.

Should readers turn to finish the article to Page A6, they’ll see the text is next to a house ad for a coordinated motorcycle ride, a Poker Run, to benefit the Special Olympics, perhaps coincidentally co-sponsored by the Times. In very large informal type, it is titled:
“Rumble in the Ozarks.”

The only quiet Rumble is a stomach at 5 p.m. -30-