{"id":196,"date":"2006-06-08T11:51:42","date_gmt":"2006-06-08T17:51:42","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/benpollock.com\/brick\/index.php\/2006\/06\/08\/seeding-a-rain-cloud\/"},"modified":"2011-03-04T10:43:46","modified_gmt":"2011-03-04T16:43:46","slug":"seeding-a-rain-cloud","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/benpollock.com\/brick\/2006\/06\/seeding-a-rain-cloud\/","title":{"rendered":"Seeding a rain cloud"},"content":{"rendered":"

Copyright 2006 Ben S. Pollock<\/small><\/p>\n

It has come to my attention that I am mostly unable to predict the future. Also, I am told, for the most part I cannot shape the future. (If you prefer, substitute “we” or “you” for the “I” because this really is not all about me.<\/span>\u009d It’s never about me<\/span>\u009d when you can see yourself in my escapades and thoughts — that is why we remain interested in other people: They remind us of … wait for it … us.)<\/p>\n

It’s not all or nothing; I indicated mostly<\/span>\u009d and partly<\/span>.\u009d I can see a little that lies ahead. It’s safe to say the sun will come up tomorrow and that I will be hungry for eggs — for if I’m wrong, it won’t matter. And to a partial degree I can create my destiny. Even though I can be partly successful, I am unable to predict it. My, but the future cannot be contained in linear thought. Drat.<\/p>\n

After years of reflection, then trial and error as well, this leads to a life lesson:<\/p>\n

If one is neutral or optimistic about one’s prospects in any facet of life, such as love or work, then the future indeed is pretty much both unpredictable and uncontrollable. If, conversely, you are either generally pessimistic or specifically a wee self-destructive, then congratulations! You can mold your future. Yes, the power is yours to screw it up.<\/p>\n

If you seek the best, or seek great things, then all the forces of nature — more than that, all the other people who intersect with you — intersect with your goals. The consequences thus can seem random. If they are predestined, fine, but it’s not for us to know our fate so that makes no difference. Thus, the outcome is anyone’s guess.<\/p>\n

You can jinx something, though. If you create a hairline fracture in the cosmos you narrow the likelihood of your goal failing. This allows you to increase the accuracy of predictions of your life ahead! For many people — for me at odd times in my decades of life — this is a relief: Can’t it be better to face the bad known than the anything’s-possible unknown?<\/p>\n

It need not be conscious. I played baritone\/euphonium from seventh grade to, well, I’m still playing horns. In high school I always made All-District Bands, but senior year I placed well enough in that to audition for All-State. All-State Band is big in Arkansas; it was almost as pivotal for Bill Clinton as his making Boys’ State. My big brother got a chair in All-State several years. At best, obviously, I’d get in once.<\/p>\n

A band audition starts with judges calling out a few scales for you to play, then you deliver a prepared 3-4 minute solo (usually with a friend accompanying you on piano — thanks, Mark Parta<\/a>), and last the judges have you sightread.<\/p>\n

I’d always been fairly good at that. Taking a score, looking at it for a minute then trying to play well with no rehearsal. It went fine. Before that, though, my solo was so-so because my brain was fried from having blown the scales. Scales! I choked on the easiest and first thing. Did I will to fail? Not consciously, but did part of me?<\/p>\n

Ever since, I’ve always over-prepared and over-rehearsed for anything resembling an audition, no matter how strongly I wanted the prize. About 15 years ago I came in second to be my newspaper’s TV critic. I didn’t really want it but my sample reviews were good and the interview went great.<\/p>\n

Still I have to wonder, have I unconsciously jinxed outcomes on other matters for the comfort of predictability?<\/p>\n

My example of open intent came, thank goodness, 25 years ago. While a reporter and editor in suburban Dallas, I applied for jobs on The Associated Press and United Press International. I did great on their tests and interviews. AP was clear that there were no openings at the time, but UPI’s bureau chief was vague. He told me to phone him every couple of months. Each time he said, not yet, but keep checking. I was impatient and young. This routine stalled my career planning. After well over a year, I told him to forget it, bluntly. He had no choice but to drop me.<\/p>\n

Now UPI in 1981 was about on its second bankruptcy, and not being hired meant not being hit by the inevitable layoff. Still, never again did I deliberately jeopardize an opportunity.<\/p>\n

Or have I, then rationalized around that calibrated decision?<\/p>\n

-30-<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Copyright 2006 Ben S. Pollock It has come to my attention that I am mostly unable to predict the future. Also, I am told, for the most part I cannot shape the future. (If you prefer, substitute “we” or “you” for the “I” because this really is not all about me.\u009d It’s never about me\u009d […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[4],"tags":[36],"class_list":["post-196","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-life-lessons","tag-music"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":30,"url":"https:\/\/benpollock.com\/brick\/2005\/12\/education-tests-everyone\/","url_meta":{"origin":196,"position":0},"title":"Education tests everyone","author":"Ben S. Pollock","date":"December 8, 2005","format":false,"excerpt":"Copyright 2005 Ben S. Pollock . \"We have met the enemy, and the enemy is us,\" says Walt Kelly's Pogo. (Not Gene Kelly, who never danced punk's pogo.) That classic Cold War punch line's almost an affirmation for those of us who consider ourselves enlightened Americans. But as such, a\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "American Culture"","block_context":{"text":"American Culture","link":"https:\/\/benpollock.com\/brick\/category\/american-culture\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":288,"url":"https:\/\/benpollock.com\/brick\/2007\/02\/rough-cuts\/","url_meta":{"origin":196,"position":1},"title":"Rough Cuts","author":"Ben S. Pollock","date":"February 27, 2007","format":false,"excerpt":"Decision-making, in retrospect, was simpler in youth, even the tough decisions. From choosing which burger to which college, most were cut-and-dried. The more the years pass, the more complicated it gets. I bet the young folks have no trouble picking out a home computer or laptop. At a store, the\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Body, Home, Street"","block_context":{"text":"Body, Home, Street","link":"https:\/\/benpollock.com\/brick\/category\/body-home-street\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":2405,"url":"https:\/\/benpollock.com\/brick\/2010\/11\/the-future-exactly\/","url_meta":{"origin":196,"position":2},"title":"The Future, Exactly","author":"Ben S. Pollock","date":"November 6, 2010","format":false,"excerpt":"Copyright 2010 Ben S. Pollock. \"Today is your birthday.\" (This is the special section of the Daily Newspaper Horoscope. You remember newspapers -- impartial facts, reasoned commentary, comics for the kiddies, and a Zodiac that isn't truth, comment or let's face it healthy for children. Now more than ever, Newspapers\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "News, Spin"","block_context":{"text":"News, Spin","link":"https:\/\/benpollock.com\/brick\/category\/news-spin\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":236,"url":"https:\/\/benpollock.com\/brick\/2006\/09\/it-was-a-tuesday\/","url_meta":{"origin":196,"position":3},"title":"It was a Tuesday","author":"Ben S. Pollock","date":"September 10, 2006","format":false,"excerpt":"On an infamous morning like 9\/11, the one five years ago, you don't know what terror the afternoon will see. Evening finally came, and whether or not you had constant access to television during the day, you sure kept your eyes on the tube that night. To make sense of\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Life Lessons"","block_context":{"text":"Life Lessons","link":"https:\/\/benpollock.com\/brick\/category\/life-lessons\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":298,"url":"https:\/\/benpollock.com\/brick\/2007\/03\/wayne-reagan-and-lincoln\/","url_meta":{"origin":196,"position":4},"title":"Wayne, Reagan and Lincoln","author":"Ben S. Pollock","date":"March 16, 2007","format":false,"excerpt":"Will Rogers Writer's Workshop, OKLAHOMA CITY -- This Friday-Saturday set of seminars concerned humor writing -- for newspapers, magazines, books and in one session greeting cards, covering the writing of funny essays but also sound feature reporting. Improving one's marketing skills was featured in several ways. 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