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Fables Poetry

Bush Versus Gore in Verses Leaves Voters to Curses

Loose Leaves, 1st run Sunday 6 August 2000 in The Morning News of Northwest Arkansas By Ben Pollock Copyright 2000 Donrey Media Group DATELINE MIRTHOLOGY — The first presidential debate was held just last night. Due to its nature, improvisational rhyming, it was short. Due to its participants, a winner could not be determined by […]

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2001 Pulitzer nominee Fables

Assault with Deadly Pun Reflects on Gag Order as Juvenile

Loose Leaves, 1st published Sunday 11 June 2000 in The Morning News of Northwest Arkansas By Ben Pollock Copyright 2000 Donrey Media Group He was just a puppy. He didn’t mean to be mean. “I can’t believe he actually broke skin, that he got a chunk of that police dog,” said a tabby cat, who […]

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2001 Pulitzer nominee Fables Poetry

Tapping Trees to Sing and Shop Amid Thoughtful Growth

Loose Leaves, 1st run Sunday 21 May 2000 in The Morning News of Northwest Arkansas By Ben Pollock Copyright 2000 Donrey Media Group DATELINE MIRTHOLOGY — Jasper Jacks was surprised by the outcry over his Wise Acres shopping center. He could think of many reasons why residents protest, but they only had one. Let’s see, […]

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2001 Pulitzer nominee Fables

Fidgeting or Sleeping, At a Musical Galop

Loose Leaves, 1st run Tuesday 8 February 2000 in The Morning News of Northwest Arkansas By Ben Pollock Copyright 2000 Donrey Media Group We gained a second ticket for the Philharmonic when the missis was asked to work late. Who would want to go, I wondered, when my thought was intercepted by my stick horse, […]

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2000 Pulitzer nominee Fables Poetry

When the chips fall, make lemonade

Loose Leaves, 1st run Tuesday 27 July 1999 in The Morning News of Northwest Arkansas By Ben S. Pollock Copyright 1999 Donrey Media Group Is there no justice anymore? I kept trying to commission a kangaroo to hear my two litigations, but Rent-A-Roo has been booked solid for weeks. Apparently, they’ve been kept hopping with […]

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1993 Pulitzer nominee Fables

Cloudy Public Image Has Primates Up in the Air

Mirthology column, 1st run Thursday 20 August 1992 in the Arkansas Democrat-Gazette By Ben S. Pollock When things get so bad you have to hire a public relations expert — indeed, have to raise the money, a lot of it, to retain one — you indeed are desperate. We apes — monkeys, primates, whatever you […]

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1993 Pulitzer nominee Fables

Steam Rises between Rider’s Tub, Rub

Mirthology column, 1st run Thursday 18 June 1992 in the Arkansas Democrat-Gazette By Ben S. PollockCopyright 1992 Ben S. Pollock Dowel Jones the stick horse has been stabled at my house, the Bengalow, for some time now. He rode here from California some years ago, carrying my imaginary college roommate … but that’s another tale. […]

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1993 Pulitzer nominee Fables

If Death Comes in Threes, then Taxes Grow on Trees

Mirthology column, 1st run Thursday 30 April 1992 in the Arkansas Democrat-Gazette By Ben S. Pollock Copyright 1992 Ben S. Pollock I didn’t need a head shrinker; of course, I was fine. A little stressed. Maybe. No, home life was fine, knock on wood. It was work. My co-workers’ superstitions about death were getting to […]

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1993 Pulitzer nominee Fables

Get Rich Quick: Enroll Sometime

Mirthology column, 1st run Thursday 9 April 1992 in the Arkansas Democrat-Gazette By Ben S. Pollock Copyright 1992 Ben S. Pollock “Time Management 2001.” Students, if that is not what you signed up for, then you’re in the wrong room. Please take the door at the rear of the classroom so as not to distract […]

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Fables

Some Very Important Folks Visit My Diner

Mirthology column, 1st run Wednesday 22 February 1989 in the Arkansas Democrat By Ben S. Pollock Copyright 1989 Ben S. Pollock Sometimes, days off are best spent reading. I took a recent break from work to finish a long novel I had been plodding through for weeks. The story begins with a Bombay-to-London jet being […]