Brick

Copy­right 2005 Ben S. Pollock

Thurs­day, Feb. 3, 2005. Friend­ship needs address­ing, maybe tomor­row. It’s not a reac­tion to a news item, either, like most Bricks. But it is a reac­tion, to how this sub­ject broadly came up in me, even though I don’t know.

With this as the lat­est exam­ple, all writ­ing is reac­tion, reac­tion to stim­uli. All action and all speech is reac­tion. So any­one who says my stuff is merely deriv­a­tive should study that fly­ing dough­nut and aim to jump on it.

Of course writing’s deriv­a­tive. Those who don’t care for these mean­der­ings, well they’re react­ing to me, no? Hah hah, got you.

My beloved some­times feels self-conscious about my con­cern for her day-to-day goings-on. I try to divert that by say­ing that I’m being merely self­ish, that when she’s unhappy she makes me mis­er­able. Sure it’s true, but com­pli­cated by being in love and thus hav­ing con­cern altruistically.

Sure, it’s all about me. It’s all always been about me, just like what con­cerns you ulti­mately is always all about you. Does that mean even believ­ing and act­ing on pro­found reli­gious faith is a means to an end, one’s self­ish end? In this con­text yes. But why be so petty? Just accept one’s ulti­mate, instinc­tive self­ish­ness. Accept it … on faith. –30–